Alexander's

4649

The basics of japanese mails are super simple.
First — There can only be one sentence per line — for easy reading.
Second — Every paragraph is ended by a Kaomoji that expresses the feeling the paragraph tried to conway.
For example: today I feelt like crying!

(;>_<;)

The next part is a global rant about how much work one has at the moment.

(@_@;)

The only good thing seems to be that the drawings that are due at the end of the week are easy enough to do.
Basically just install Windows and work for half an hour.

(#^_^#)

But no matter how hard I search I just can’t find my Windows install CD.

(x_x)

Well sometimes one is lucky and the brother still has an old one lying around

(^_-)—☆

End with a happy note!

(^_^)/

And for all of you that are wondering how to start a reply to such a mail.
Either — if you didn’t understand a thing I was saying — with:

(._. )( ･･)(･･ )( ･_･)

or one of the following:

(^.^)(-.-)(_ _)
_(._.)_
<(_ _)>
m(_ _)m
f(^_^;

Recently I stumbled upon a quite funny rumor about European guys by Asian girls.

Switch your dirty mind off I’m not going to talk about presumably preeminent differences in male anatomy. Sorry to disappoint, but I’m sure the internet is chock-full of places with statistics related to that.¹

No this rumor is about our Acanthous Hair!

Yes you read that right. My hard pointy European hair will supposedly hurt the super soft milky white skin of my cute girlfriend when cuddeling or kissing — and we all know Europeans like to cuddle and kiss all the time, so this is might be a real problem.

How true is it?

Compared to the average japanese guy I’m an ape. There are lots of tiny hairs on my arms and legs, many Europeans even have fur on their breast and back and don’t even get me started about the face. Some of us have to shave twice per day to keep their beard under control!²

The good news is that European hair is — compared to the average Japanese hair — super soft. ふわふわ just like that of a pet rabbit.³ Sometimes I felt like the main attraction in a petting zoo, but from time to time it’s actually kind of funny to indulge in things like this.

Since this rumor is exactly the opposite from the truth I’m left wondering how it got started. Maybe some asian guy tried to keep his girlfriend from touching these oh so cute Europeans. Sadly I’ll probably never know for sure.