Having lived in England for several months I picked up a fondness for traditional English food. I’m not talking about the stuff that looks like cat food and smells even worse.1 No I’m talking about something like a traditional english breakfast with bacon, eggs, beans and black pudding.
One of these days a hunger for high a fat diet struck me and I decided to treat myself some delicious Fish’n Chips. Only, problem since someone spilled, what I presumed to be cheese, in the oven a few weeks back, an evil stench filled the air whenever one of us decided to use it.2
I already know this dilemma from previous experiences in this flat. The best way to resolve a situation like this is to just keep using the oven. After a month or so of regular use all the organic waste will have burned and the smell will be gone along with it.
What I didn’t know was, that this time the cheese didn’t drip, but instead erupted in the oven. Given the recent events I’m sure you all know how bad eruptions and the spewed out particles can be. This cheese was no exception, but instead of blocking air travel over Europe, it got stuck on the ceiling of the oven.
As I mentioned above England has taught me many strange things when it comes to food. I actually like my fish’n chips with vinegar and mayonnaise instead of ketchup, but the burned food particles raining down on my Fish’n Chips3 were even too much for my acquired taste.
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I guess the reason computer spam is called spam is because it’s just as undesirable as it’s canned eponym. ↩
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For various reasons none of us is willing to clean it up. ↩
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When the English say chips they are actually talking about potato chips and not burned food particles chipped from the walls of the oven. ↩
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